Image: bingo card labeled “bad at being a person bingo”
For the sake of describing this card through a narrative, the columns from left to right will be letters A thru F, and the rows top to bottom will be numbers 1 thru 5.
Squares
1A: i don’t know wtf is going on
1B: LOOK AT ALL THE PRETTY THINGS OMG SHINY
1C: elaborate daydreams
1D: something is wrong but i don’t know what
1E: why is my backpack full of rocks and papers from a year ago
2A: puts things down; where’d it go
2B: scared of human
2C: having a body is weird wtf
2D: is suddenly really good at a particular thing for 3.2 days
2E: i’m tricking people into thinking i’m one of them
3A: am i just not trying hard enough
3B: doesn’t eat; why do i feel bad
3C: error 404 motivation not found
3D: stares at wall for an hour
3E: walks out into the snow without a winter coat
4A: “why can’t you do this?” i don’t know
4B: on second thought that was a terrible decision
4C: time goes slow and then fast
4D: walks into wall
4E: World’s Most Messy Room
5A: sorry i didn’t respond to any of your messages for six months
5B: weird sense of humor
5C: how do i tell if people like me
5D: how are other people so good at talking
5E: idk if i’m coming off as creepy all the time
Edit: I just realized that I absentmindedly relabeled the columns from BINGO to ABCDE. I like mine more anyway.
I tick every single box, what do i win?
bingo
The title 👑
And a happy cake day!
Holy shit I got bingo so many times
hmmm 🤔
hmmmmm 🤔 at which ones? or the results??
also, I love the use of green bell peppers lol
Just at my overall result 😅
have you ever thought you were neurodivergent of any sort??
I’m currently on a waiting list for an official ASD diagnosis (takes around a year here, there is a huge lack of experts certified for adult cases), but my current psychiatrist already shares my assumption that I am autistic. I’m in my 30s, so I have three decades worth of built-up trauma from being diagnosed and treated improperly, having been in some form of psychological or psychiatric care basically since childhood.
In hindsight, I am a bit pissed it was never discovered/considered. It’s not like I ever kept signs like my delayed speech acquisition in childhood, early reading/writing acquisition, daily meltdowns as a kid which morphed into internalised shame, shutdowns and depression/burnout with age a secret.
What I was most fascinated by was the things I did not tick off. Like, because I got extremely good at masking and studying behaviours/“roleplaying” identities and internalising them, I am actually relatively competent in social settings/situations. They sure are exhausting though…
Also, just a few weeks ago, when I was still in my “pushing myself too hard (because that is how you overcome depression and anxiety, right? Just do the things and learn they are safe and stuff), failing and then internalising self-hatred” - spiral, I would definitely also have had the “messy room” one and “motivation 404” one.
I am a bit pissed it was never discovered/considered. It’s not like I ever kept signs like my delayed speech acquisition in childhood, early reading/writing acquisition, daily meltdowns as a kid which morphed into internalised shame, shutdowns and depression/burnout with age a secret.
Yep! I’m still going thru something similar. If someone ever develops a program for newly diagnosed autistics, it’s probably going to include a grief and forgiveness section, followed by learning to develop new trust in yourself and others.
Oh, for sure, currently doing that kind of processing solo. If my experience with going through the psychotherapy and psychiatry systems for decades has given me anything, thankfully, it’s the ability to reflect and process shit.
Good luck for you and your path in life, too. It sucks you went to similar things, but as Sartre said: “Freedom is what we do with what is done to us.” There’s always a path forward.
It’s one of the pre installed brushes in GIMP
If I didn’t have aphantasia I’d probably have row 1 box 3 marked as well. I get lost in thought, but it’s more logistical planning for eco transformation type stuff (how to convert parking garages into hydroponic farms and the like)
Also messy room is whole house, and I’m doing a lot better with that, but as a kid I cleaned my room with a rake more than once.
Is there a rule that daydreams have to be visual? Spending lots of time thinking up extremely detailed strategies for unlikely hypothetical scenarios definitely qualifies as “elaborate daydreams”, in my opinion.
Idk, that’s always how you hear them represented. I just assume there’s a visual component to get people “lost in thought”, cuz while I drift away, most of what I’m conscious of is how I no longer have a way to rejoin a conversation; anything I’m thinking about would require explanation, but I’m aware of what’s going on around me generally.
Being aphantasic and not realizing it until I was… in my late 20s…? Really called a lot of things into question and I still don’t have answers for them. Like the phrase “close your eyes and picture…” I used to think it was like…metaphorical? Turns out they actually mean picture the thing in your mind.
I think visual daydreams are just the most common type, so that’s what people tend to describe. I don’t have aphantasia and yet I often find myself getting lost in imagined conversations with people I know, or mentally rehearsing how I would teach/explain something, or trying to optimize a build or loadout in whatever video game I’ve gotten interested in lately. None of that feels any different from a typical daydream in terms of experience; I’m just using my imagination verbally or logically instead of visually.
No bingo. Guess I’m just not trying hard enough.
I mean it’s isomorphic to a bingo, so that’s cool.
nerd shit
An isomorphism is a structure-preserving reversible mapping. Pick any board configuration with a bingo and the same number of marked squares. There exists an isomorphism mapping from your board to a board configuration with a bingo. Specifically, by switching pairs of squares until you get a bingo, the record of switches you made defines an isomorphism that takes your board to a bingo board.
Practically, this just means that you just have at least 5 squares.
I feel much better, thank you
Wow, almost a blackout. Even the ones I didn’t mark are still things that I do, just not frequently enough for them to seem unusual.
I’m jealous, the ones you didn’t mark are the things that irritate me most about my autism. What’s it like not bumping into a wall every day?
Wall Avoidance is a nice QoL perk but it’s buggy and only fully applies to static terrain. It’s unreliable around dynamic objects like swinging doors, fails often when performing inputs rapidly, and absolutely will not work with anything that temporarily modifies the user’s hitbox. It’s also really hard to gauge the perk’s overall value without knowing which of my debuffs is the one that was applied to cover the equipping cost. I really can’t recommend unlocking it unless you’re specifically going for a DEX build, and even then you likely have many better options available.
Bingo!
Damn, 3 separate bingos and edging on a black out
On an unrelated note:4B is a perfect example of why false confidence is more important, than actual confidence. If you just loudly say"I fucked up" and make it into a joke, you can make mistakes as much as you want.
The one thing I like the least is A2. Seriously, once I had to sleep at a friend’s house because I couldn’t find my key, which was in my pocket all along. If said friend hadn’t been there I probably would have slept outside.
I once put my phone down to help my dad lift something, and literally not five full seconds later had to ask someone where it was.
That one’s gonna haunt me for a while.
Humans aren’t real and they can’t hurt me.
The only reason I don’t qualify for messy room (anymore) is that I share bedroom with my spouse. Once the kids move out and I can get my own home office, I’ll probably be able to check it again.
Pretty sure I’m not creepy. People don’t seem to avoid me or complain.
I love the cat marker!😸
Blackout with two asterisks:
Puts things down, where’d it go: I usually don’t do this, but only because I am very deliberate and systematic about where I put things. Similar to the sock question. (Do socks bother you? No, because I have a system)
Walking into walls (and other stationary objects): I don’t do this much anymore, but I did quite a bit as a child.
Answer to backpack question: it’s leg day™
So close.
