I just don’t know what to make of this migration. I hate that it has to happen and I hate that many trans people can’t leave even though they want to. I hope it’s also an opportunity to build stronger communities in new places.

my partner is trans and we are planning to move. we have wanted to for years because of issues in our state/area, but now it’s become more urgent. but we have friends and community here we’ll be leaving behind, and it makes us really sad. we are also conflicted about our personal well being vs staying and representing our community.

if you’re in a hell state, will you move? have you already? or will you stay where you are?

  • Dee@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    I was in Texas and moved to Oregon about sixish years ago, I saw the writing on the wall then and was making plans to get out. I miss my friends and family, it’s true. I miss a lot of things in Texas like favorite stores and hangouts and definitely the BBQ. That aspect gets better with time, and with mourning those aspects of your life you’ve lost. Overall I’ve been much, much happier in Oregon though. It’s literally like night and day, sure Oregon has issues, no denying that. But the sense of security and well being I’ve been able to enjoy since moving has been priceless.

    It wasn’t until I moved to Oregon that I felt the support and comfort needed for breaking out of my trans egg. Now I’m enjoying being my true self and meeting like-minded people around me who accept me and vote for politicians that aren’t trying to exterminate me. I’d like the bar to be higher than that but here we are lol

    I feel bad for my LGBTQ friends and family still in Texas. Thankfully all my family has escape plans in place and should be out in about a year or so, but not all my friends do. So I worry about them, especially after that last Allen Mall shooting because that’s the general area I’m from.

  • kool_newt@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    IMO this and the abortion stuff is about driving blue voters out of state so that Republicans can retake the senate. The senate is a body designed for minority control and they know they’ll never again have the majority.

    • adderaline@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      The reality is that lots of people, or even most people, can’t afford to move out of their home states. The idea that this kind of migration is significantly affecting voting patterns is not something i’ve seen validated in polls. Point me in the right direction if you’ve seen any data supporting that idea.

      • kool_newt@beehaw.org
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        1 year ago

        Well, I’m claiming this as a potential Republican scheme to affect the future (a hunch, not a a fact). Not only are Republicans not known for sound policy based on data, but it’s still very early, moving takes time.

    • sharpiemarker@feddit.de
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      1 year ago

      Not really. It’s driving blue voters out of republican stronghold states. Florida? Oklahoma? Missouri? Kentucky? They’ll never be blue anyway.

  • LucyLastic@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    After the Brexit vote I moved away from the UK, one of the reasons is my partner is from another country and there was a general feeling of hostility in the air … I can empathise with those leaving, and if it were me I’d be doing the same thing!

    FWIW making a new life has been very rewarding and we’re in a much better place, moving can be about making something new more than losing something old. Now when I visit “home” I feel very glad to have got away.

  • Wulfinna@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    I’m a 25 transfemme in East Tennessee. I used to be a Kentuckian until I moved closer to family due to an abusive relationship at the time, about mid 2021. I’m happy to say I’ve found a person here who treats me spectacularly, and while I’ve given this state my best attempt to find a home here… the people who run this state are genuinely Evil. I didn’t really believe in evil until talk about “g*nital inspections” started coming up in this state and others for dictating incredibly dehumanizing policies onto an already incredibly vulnerable minority. Disgusting hateful nonsense cloaked in religion plagues this state, the birthplace of the KKK. My partner is from here and she’s more interested in staying and fighting or waiting the situation out. I’m incredibly conflicted. It seems like every day a law against us isn’t coming out is just another day they’re plotting to attack us in our weakest points. I find myself daydreaming about me and my partner trying out long-distance until she figures out employment where I would be after moving to a relatively non-freedom-infringing state like Minnesota or Michigan. I just don’t know which path to go down. We’re both believers in armed self-defense, and one advantage of being in a deep-red state is being able to be strapped out in public while looking adorable. I value that agency to be oneself and assert that you will Not be bothered. In some sense, I would like to leave the United States altogether, but I don’t know what the winds have in store for me. I just despise with all the hate in my heart what is happening here and even abroad with UK’s transphobic fervor and Uganda’s green-lighting of queer genocide. I don’t know what’s going to happen, but there are two incredibly determined forces gearing up to smashing head-on into each other after a multitude of skirmishes and punditry no longer suffice. Life itself is going through one great turning of the wheel, it seems.

    • Cade@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      I’m also in east Tennessee and have been brainstorming an exit plan in a worst case scenario. It sucks because I really do love it here.

      As far as trans rights go, the US is a lot better than a lot of countries just because we have informed consent. I was actually looking into what countries are good for trans folks and the list is shorter than you’d think. Honestly, if we fight it out here, I think the US could become one of the best places to be trans in.

      But yeah… With what’s happening with Vanderbilt, it’s probably a good idea get an exit plan at the very least

    • soiling@beehaw.orgOP
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      1 year ago

      thanks for sharing. I echo a lot of these sentiments. I don’t think there’s a right answer in a situation like this. we didn’t choose to be targets of hatred, we’re just dealing with it.

  • laird_dave@feddit.de
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    1 year ago

    Right now Germany appears a lot safer than the US and a lot of us will fight to keep it that way.

    If you don’t know where to go have a look here.

    (Disclaimer: just an ally, not trans myself. I “only” have some trans friends.)

    • soiling@beehaw.orgOP
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      1 year ago

      Thanks :) My partner and I talk about Berlin a lot. It seems like an amazing place. I don’t know if we’ll be able to leave the US for a few years at least though.

  • GivingEuropeASpook@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    And think of all the people who can’t. combined, it’s absurd that people in liberal states are just scoffing and telling them to move to California or New York. Cost of living aside, 200K+ people should not be forced to become refugees in their own country as the “solution” to anti-trans laws. Internal refugees are not something a supposed (liberal) democracy should have.

  • FocusedFranklin@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    Come to Minnesota for the freedom to be yourself, stay for the hotdish. I am really happy that my state is welcoming, and frustrated that other states are not.

  • My girlfriend is also trans, and she lives in Arkansas. She lost her job, so I’ve been trying to both support her financially and also facilitate her move up here to Washington. Ugh… why does everything cost money?

  • Neotecha (She/her)@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    Currently in Florida, don’t have immediate plans to move. My mother-in-law is recently widowed, so we want to stay close.

    I’m trans, but I also live with a lot of personal privilege (well paying job with non-state insurance, white, married, liberal city, no kids, haven’t faced direct discrimination). The particular set of laws that Florida has passed are limited in how they affect me.

    That’s not to say i don’t care – I’m actually livid with my state government. Many of my trans/queer friends have rightly left the state already, but I personally can stay around for longer to push back as I can

    I’ve spoken to my brother in Illinois, and if worse comes to worse, i have somewhere I can go if Florida becomes unlivable