I was hanging out with a women I went on a few dates with in the early 2010s. I was taken aback by her bad takes that evening, especially the body shaming and gossiping going on about mutual friends. She asks me why I’m vegan and I’m like “oh I went into a slaughterhouse once before, you can’t believe…”. And she interrupts me “Oh please don’t tell me!” Honestly this woman if fine. She’s not evil, just a bit bougie and lib. I’ve met much worse though.
I can’t get over all the women I’ve dated that have been super anti vegan or vegetarian, they were kinda shitty about other stuff later on. At the time it was shitty to fight with and lose someone who I cared about and spent a lot of time with, but in hindsight I’m so lucky they’re gone. Quite a few dates I’ve been on have been fine or positive about veganism, and our friendship has stood the test of time.
I’m sure this is just true for caring about other oppressed groups. Like if a date didn’t give a feck about Palestine or queer people, they probably suck. I’m honestly sorry for people that date men, as so many of us have terrible convictions.
It’s doubly important for me because food is just a love language for me. Having a cute girl snuggle up to me while i’m cooking stir fry for us, taking her out to a nice restaurant, making a big breakfast when she’s stayed overnight, these are pretty integral to my dating life and that gets soured when people start whining where the meat is.
It’s admittedly gotten much better since i came out and stuck to only dating other trans girls, everybody i’ve been with in the last 3 years was either vegan herself or flexitarian and perfectly happy with entirely vegan options. That’s not necessarily a trans thing, it may be largely because my bubble within the queer community is a lot more progressive than average, but it really makes things easier when you’re centering like-minded people in your life. ofc that gets a lot harder when you’re out on the apps instead, and don’t get me started about the stories that the bi, pan and straight girls i know keep telling. When you check for red flags and wonder if somebody’s values are compatible with yours, you’re already doing loads better than most dudes out there, it’s honestly baffling how many men seem to flat-out refuse to read profiles before they start DMing and just wildly take shots in the dark at everybody that looks remotely hot to them.
I get it. When I come home with food, my partner likes to open EVERY FUCKING CONTAINER and sample literally everything we have. She gets all guilty cuz it’s unusual and she stresses her weight a bit. But you know what, it’s adorable. I’m glad af that she’s getting pure bliss out of hummus, dal, fruit, cakes, etc.
I feel like that’s a good way to be… Sorry the pool is smallish. But I really never see a trans person with a bad POV on the world.
I almost wish their were apps for vetted lefties. But as soon as it was successful, asshole horny dudes would invade it.