Do they have to buy anything to count as customers?

The of failsons and faildaughters that trashed the store around me, including one of the hoggiest hogs among them shoving an entire sub sandwich from the deli down the crotch of his pants and several others outright pushing entire shelves over while screaming like some sort of Varsity Blues LARP, that probably takes the cake if it counts when none of them bought anything except the limo driver that got a pity bag of chips to sweeten his vague apology.

Yeah yeah I know but it’s pure idealism to expect me to just smile and nod to that and cheerfully become unemployed and homeless and drop out of college by doing nothing, so of course I called the police to at least stop them from destroying my remaining prospects of keeping that job, though none of them were due to get more than an overnight drunk tank visit because, according to the cops themselves, “he’s the son of a city council member” and “she’s the daughter of some tech company ceo.”

I guess the moral of the story is still all things considered there.