So wait, the person who correctly recognizes your antisocial behavior and your server who expects you to uphold the expectations of your dining interactions are the entitled people here, not you who feels like you shouldn’t have to even though you know it’s expected and that you’re only harming your server when you don’t?

You are describing feeling entitled to receive the servers (and kitchen, some places split tips) labor for a lower rate and justifying it because you don’t feel like the social system that labor relation exists under is right.

It’s not right, but that doesn’t make you not a bad person when you don’t tip.

To go a little further: you describe servers doing all these things themselves, guilting everyone into paying more, expecting (all by themselves. as if everyone you dine with doesn’t expect you to tip too!) to be paid for their work. At no point do you place blame with or advocate taking action against the forces and structures that uphold tipped wages as a system. If you had an analysis that didn’t hinge on blaming the server for wanting to be paid I could look past it, but it’s germane here as another example of your entitlement to their work for a reduced rate.

Out of curiosity, what was this south Asian island nation?