• Binthinkin@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    If you have daughters please train them in self defense. Best to train it young and encourage it as a hobby into adulthood. It’s better than weapons and more effective. Breaking an assailant’s arm comes with way less PTSD than shooting someone.

    Edit: I am a fan of living a self reliant life. It’s a very wholesome and well rounded way to live. Carl Sagan promoted it and it is a solid way to actually live free rather than under the falsities of the self proclaimed “main stream” portion of society. Self Defense is a major part of that. Self defense also does not mean being a master of it, just enough to get away safely.

    Edit2: Yea this post isn’t victim blaming. There are many benefits to self defense including confidence building. You are literally empowering your kids. Idk why people don’t like doing that except to control them. Again, teaching self defense isn’t teaching violence. If you don’t know the difference it would be enlightening to discover it.

    • blazeknave@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I don’t disagree but I think it’s a lot easier for me to teach my son not to be a rapist. At 7 he understands boundaries. It’s not hard.

      • MrLuemasG@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Yeah… too bad you can’t teach other people’s sons not to be rapists - they’re the ones you’ve gotta worry about

        • DreamButt@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Better yet we do both. Hell we should also be spreading awareness and providing programs to help support people to prevent and recover from incidents like this. It’s a complex social issue so it should be tackled from all directions simultaneously

          • MrLuemasG@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Completely agreed. I don’t think anybody is out here saying “teach people to defend themselves but don’t even bother trying to teach people not to assault others”

        • madcaesar@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Let’s also not forget that a certain percentage of people are simply fucked up beyond repair, no matter how they are raised.

          So teaching women basic self defense is absolutely the way to go.

          I want to live in a world, where this piece of shit tries to rape someone and ends up with a broken nose, arm and exploded nutsack.

        • ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          It’s amazing what you can do if you try.

          Did you know that modern society has an entire profession based around teaching other people’s sons? Like, adults learn for years how to do this, and then we pay those people to teach our sons and everyone else’s sons too. Most countries even make it a legal requirement to be taught by someone!

          It’s amazing.

    • girlfreddy@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      How about instead we train boys that they do not own women, nor do they have a right to demand women obey them.

      Teach your children well.

      • Fraylor@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        Both. Both is an option because you can’t train the monster out of some people.

          • Account5600@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Yeah and we shouldn’t wear seatbelts because we shouldn’t be held accountable for what some other drunken idiot does on the road

            Yeah, maybe you’re right, but you need to accept the reality that you can’t control the actions of others and that you should still take precautionary measures to protect yourself

          • ruckblack@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            Why are we pretending that this is just an inherent quality that needs to be taught out rather than a serious deviation from the norm? “Teach people not to murder” yeah, uh, we do, and unreasonable people still murder.

            • MrLuemasG@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              Also if your only solution is “everybody SHOULD do X”, you’ve already failed. Reality is that we are so far away from everybody doing the “right” thing that refusing to take any basic precautions is just setting somebody up to get hurt.

              It’s like telling people they don’t need to bring bear spray on hikes in a bear infested wood because the bears shouldn’t try to hurt you.

              • ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world
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                1 year ago

                It’s disingenuous to compare a wild animal without reasoning ability with a male human.

                If you have the impulse control of a bear, there is something medically wrong with you.

                • ThyTTY@lemmy.world
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                  1 year ago

                  I am pretty sure there are people with the impulse control of a bear. These are probably not the same people discussing these matters over Internet

                • ruckblack@sh.itjust.works
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                  1 year ago

                  Yes, and there are plenty of people out there with things medically wrong with them which will cause them to act out violently. It’s only wise to prepare for a potential run-in with one of these people. Whether they “should” act out against you or not.

            • girlfreddy@sh.itjust.works
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              1 year ago

              Unreasonable murderers are not the norm tho.

              Men thinking they can control women is far more common, and the cure for that is parents teaching their kids that shit won’t be tolerated.

              • Drigo@sopuli.xyz
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                1 year ago

                Yeah, but I don’t trust other parents to actually teach their sons that. So I will still have to teach my daughters to defend themselves against those kind of people.

              • ruckblack@sh.itjust.works
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                1 year ago

                Lol. Yeah. I was more comparing murder to rape. I don’t know where you live, but where I live, men raping women is not normalized.

          • FinnFooted@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            I agree with the sentiment, some people won’t be raising their sons right. And, while we need to push those people, we also need to be real about the world we live in otherwise girls and women are going to get hurt. There are bad people. telling them to be better won’t make them be better, won’t make them go away, and won’t make you safe from them. Its about as useful as thoughts and prayers.

          • Crazypartypony@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Some people have mental health issues of various forms, learning disabilities, traumatic brain injury… there are lots of other reasons you should still be able to defend yourself. The training from other parents doesn’t negate the threat. Don’t advocate for being helpless.

      • Pratai@lemmy.ca
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        1 year ago

        Because we can’t train other people’s kids- but we can train our own.

          • rbesfe@lemmy.ca
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            1 year ago

            Wrap it up everyone, we’ve stopped rapists by…

            checks notes

            being condescending about it on the internet

          • Pratai@lemmy.ca
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            1 year ago

            But you can’t guarantee they’re doing it- so train your daughter to kick some ass.

            And for the record, I was never trained to not be a rapey manipulative asshole, and I’m none of those things, so let’s stop with the blanket statements.

        • ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          It’s amazing what you can do if you try.

          Did you know that modern society has an entire profession based around teaching other people’s sons? Like, adults learn for years how to do this, and then we pay those people to teach our sons and everyone else’s sons too. Most countries even make it a legal requirement to be taught by someone!

          It’s amazing.

    • IamSparticles@lemmy.zip
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      1 year ago

      Okay. But also, if you have a son teach them that women are not objects that owe them sex if they follow some script in their head.

    • Scubus@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      I agree with this, but I also think it would be a good idea to teach them how to defend themselves with weapons as well. There are certain situations where legally it will be less of a problem for you if you just kill the threat. You don’t want to end up paying your would-be rapists medical bills over some dumb technicality.

    • Pratai@lemmy.ca
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      1 year ago

      Imagine the pathetic life of the two people that downvoted this comment.

    • Son_of_dad@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      My daughter has been learning defense since she was 8, went through different classes including MMA. She’s such a sweet kid and runs away from danger, but she’s got enough to fight with if it ever comes to it. Still wish I could follow her around looking mean everywhere she goes. But if a guy ever did this to her, I would deal with him myself.

    • JoBo@feddit.uk
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      1 year ago

      This is unrealistic victim-blaming.

      Teach your sons to control themselves and your daughters to go hard for the balls.

  • Gork@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    How did this go undetected? Dorm rooms don’t exactly have the best privacy.

    • bane_killgrind@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      A bunch of campus housing is empty during the summer months, depending on what city you are in.

      There is a dorm an hour north of me that gets rented out for staff housing needed during local festivals, I stayed there when I had that job.

    • some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org
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      1 year ago

      Someone else answered plausibly. But I have a different question. How did he think he could even begin to get away with this? I know some of the answers to that before anyone answers, but even still… wtf was he thinking?

  • WarmSoda@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    That’s the kind of kid you want to check around his neighborhood for dead animals.

  • datavoid@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    Why did I assume he was guilty the second the picture loaded?? 😂