My good friend at work is dating a guy that is also a coworker and at first I thought this guy was pretty cool.

As it turns out, he’s batshit insane and a horrible human being.

It has come to my attention recently that he had been spreading rumors and information about me and sexual identity (Bi), outing me in order to manipulate the work place into being “against me”. Including outing me to close work friends of mine that I was keeping that part of my life private from out of fear of losing their friendship.

I have already gone through HR, and that employee is currently being investigated, but the more I find out, the worse it gets.

This guy has been threatened by my friendship with his girlfriend, my close friend who I have known longer than him, and without either of our knowledge, he installed a spy app on her phone which gave him access to every text, snap, instagram, Facebook, phone calls, and even what she does online. I know this because she came to me saying her phone was acting up, and me being ex-IT, found the app he installed on her phone.

Recently I just heard from another coworker that he has been telling people of my gay sexual relationships which I do not recall ever telling him. He has also told coworkers about things I have texted her verbatim, so I am starting to think that he may have possibly gathered information about my sex life through text messages to her, without either of us knowing he could read them, and has been telling my other work colleagues.

I know this guy isn’t coming back to the work place, but I feel so crossed that I’m not sure even that’s enough. I want to know if, because he obtained that information illegally, I could file a lawsuit against him as well.

I have felt so violated all this week because of this guy, someone who I thought I was friends with and even defended at times, stabbed me in the back and did this horrible thing to me.

Obviously this is lemmy and I don’t expect there to be any lawyers here, but do you think I may have a case?

    • SomeoneElse@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      If you take action against him, is he likely to take it out on your friend? If she can’t leave him, that might inform your decision.

    • Jellojiggle@lemmy.fmhy.ml
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      1 year ago

      Why doesn’t your “friend” stick up for you to this asshole? If legal routes don’t work, you can always find some sort of petty revenge to make his life a living hell. If you’re into that kind of thing.

      • half_fiction@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        1 year ago

        It seems pretty clear the friend is in an abusive relationship, so it really isn’t that simple. The comment you’re replying to literally described how their friend felt unsafe taking any action, especially with her child living there, so I think that’s your answer.

        • Jellojiggle@lemmy.fmhy.ml
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          1 year ago

          You are correct. Thank you for holding me accountable. Sometimes I can be shortsighted, as it is human nature, and not consider the whole story. Sorry OP for coming off as a dick. I am empathetic to your situation and I hope you find some justice and your friend and her child can find a way to leave safely.