I am a singlish women who has a long term friends with benefits, but is looking for a more substantial relationship. The thing is my fwb is used to me interrupting sexy times to tell them what ever thought that just popped into my head. Thankfully they are spectrumy too. (Ok this usually only happens during foreplay) but I am curious is this a ‘just me’ thing or are there others and am I stuck being intimate with only other people on the spectrum?

  • 18107@aussie.zone
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    11 months ago

    My partner and I will routinely “ruin the moment” with stupid jokes and off topic thoughts. It hasn’t ruined our relationship yet.

    You could theoretically just excersise more conscious control over what you say, but that often leads to exhaustion/burnout. It’s so much better to find someone who understands you, and who you can relax and be yourself around.

    • InquisitiveApathy@lemm.ee
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      11 months ago

      My partner and I will routinely “ruin the moment” with stupid jokes and off topic thoughts. It hasn’t ruined our relationship yet.

      This is my experience as well. Weird things get said sometimes, but it rarely ever ruins the mood. Sometimes it can slow the momentum though, but it ends up being because we’re laughing more than anything.

  • itsathursday@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    If you build a connection with someone that wants to share that experience with you I’d say they’d be totally into whatever you say at any time because they will get you, sexy times or not.

  • Septimaeus@infosec.pub
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    11 months ago

    Not just you. That’s normal and fun, and I think few but the impatient would complain if it’s during foreplay.

  • JimboDHimbo@lemmy.ca
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    11 months ago

    Edit: omg my apologies y’all, I didn’t read the entire name of the community, I just saw ADHD and started commenting. That’s my bad, ladies. I’ll show myself out.

  • LegionEris [she/her]M
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    11 months ago

    Interestingly, I almost never have this problem since getting my hormones right. Getting lost in (or attacked by!) sex less thoughts used to occasionally plague our bedroom. Now sex is so fucking enormous that it tends to eclipse everything. My body is louder and more talkative than it used to be.