Boyfriend strange behaviour

Lolli56@lemm.ee to

Relationship Advice@lemmy.worldEnglish · 10 months ago

Hi!

I’m dating an amazing guy. He’s very sweet and caring. He’s kind of a quiet guy.

We started dating after a friend of his brought me a note he wanted to give me (but then threw away because he was indecisive) that said how much he loved me.

I took it and invited him over to my place. At first he was afraid to touch me and I took the initiative. Lately, he has become more active in this respect and is no longer afraid to just come up and hug me.

Everything would be very good, but I can’t understand one thing. Why does he always shake when we hug? I’ve asked him about it, but he keeps silent or blushes or says “I’m sorry”. I’m very worried about him and his health. Take him to doctor?

We’ve been together for 3 months. 2nd year of university. Same age.

Chat

SuperSpruce@lemmy.zip
link
fedilink
English
arrow-up
3·
10 months ago
This guy’s behavior seems quite like myself.

He’s probably been rejected a hundred times and the notion that “touching is just coming on too strong” has been drilled into his brain again and again. He’s not used to having a girlfriend actually loving him.

Relationship Advice@lemmy.world

relationship_advice@lemmy.world

Create a post

You are not logged in. However you can subscribe from another Fediverse account, for example Lemmy or Mastodon. To do this, paste the following into the search field of your instance: !relationship_advice@lemmy.world

Welcome to the Relationship Advice community on Lemmy and Kbin!

The ideal place to ask for help with your relationships: romantic, friendships, we don’t know what we are yet, co-workers or just human interactions in general.

Please make sure you read our rules before posting.

Rules:

Rules can be clicked on to be expanded.

1: Treat all users with respect. [!]

The goal of this community is helping OP and readers, not making fun of them. We are an inclusive community, any sort of disrespect towards ethnicity, sexual orientation, religion, etc, will not be tolerated.

2: Mark sexual content as NSFW. [!]

Posts containing mentions or descriptions of sexual topics must be tagged as NSFW. This includes descriptions of sexual acts, requests for advice in the bedroom, explicit descriptions of your body and similar content.

3: All posts must be a request for advice.

All posts must be phrased as a request for advice or as a question. Sharing of stories, personal anecdotes, or past mistakes are only allowed if they’re followed by a clear and relevant request for advice with the situation.

4: Provide sufficient and relevant information.

Your title and body need to contain enough information relevant to your situation, such as ages, genders, and the relationship between people mentioned. For privacy-related concerns, we recommend using fake names and broad general locations.

5: Comments must be on topic and relevant to OP.

Comments must be directly related to helping OP, asking for more information, providing relevant resources or otherwise relevant to the thread. Off-topic comments and remarks, suspicious attempts at gathering personal data from OP or other readers, or bullying will not be tolerated.

6: This is a community for requesting advice, not moral judgement.

Moral judgements, “AITA?” and other similar questions are better served by different communities.

Reddit reposts are allowed.

As a temporary measure and the result of a poll, Reddit reposts are allowed following an expanded set of rules: https://lemmy.world/post/317115

How are rules enforced and bans applied?

For the most part, this community operates under the assumption that users are acting in good faith and should be given second-chances for their mistakes. Posts and comments with very light rule violations, or otherwise undesired but mostly harmless content, can be removed by a moderator on a case by case basis without any further punitive actions.

For violations of our rules, we follow a “3 strike” system as follows:

1st violation: 72 hours ban + moderator warning via PMs.
2nd violation: 1 week ~ 1 month ban + final warning via PMs.
3rd violation: 1 month ~ permanent ban.

The goal of this system is making sure users are made aware of their behavior before being permanently banned, but also protecting the community from any rule violations.

Exceptions:

While the “3 strike” system will be applied to the majority of situations, rules marked with a [!] in the sidebar signifies a rule that, if violated in an intentional, malicious or significant way, can warrant an immediate permanent ban regardless of the number of previous violations. This includes severe disrespect to users or groups, dangerous content, and similar.

Related communities:

Adulting: !adulting@lemmy.world
No Stupid Questions: !nostupidquestions@lemmy.world
Mental Health !mentalhealth@lemmy.world

Visibility: Public

This community can be federated to other instances and be posted/commented in by their users.

17 users / day
34 users / week
148 users / month
2.02K users / 6 months
10 local subscribers
2.51K subscribers
98 Posts
1.65K Comments
Modlog

mods:
kadu@lemmy.world