Drowning in work still but can’t seem to really care. Weather is shitty and haven’t been able to take meds due to a long complicated combo of things so dreading starting back again because the first week is always hell.

My dog has more tumors and I am paralyzed by the fear I am losing her too quickly though I have no real evidence and many dogs live years and long happy lives with these kinds of tumors. And we have a plan of action I just have to implement it (worried though I am making the wrong choice in treatment)

And I feel so alone at work. I’ve never not had some sort of mentor and it’s been almost three years of this job with no accountability and no mentoring. And feeling really distant with my coworkers. I’ve tried really hard to reach out to mentors and guidance and it’s just not there. I remember why now I didn’t go into this field the first time around and ran from it though I didn’t understand it at the time.

And utterly grateful for this community because it is one of the only spaces where I feel understood. I may not know anyone personally but just having a place to vent this out with no fear, no toxic positivity or negativity and general acceptance is very relieving. I wish I could give back as much I take from this community, but know I am rooting for each everyone of you from here and am thankful for you all.

Happy celebrations to you all celebrating, (birthdays, holidays, personal successes) and sending strength to those who need extra this week.