• 10 Posts
  • 46 Comments
Joined 7 months ago
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Cake day: November 24th, 2023

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  • I was just trying to explain why you’re not finding the material you’re looking for, I am absolutely learning in a vacuum too.

    My advice was not “have you tried not?”, it was a recommendation to do what other girlies have done, use their knowledge and experience, do what is already working. That’s exactly why we have spaces like this, and the matrix chatrooms, and other trans spaces.

    Cis girls generally don’t do it the way you are trying to, and you will continue to have lesser results while you do it this way. Cis girls did not do this alone, you’re not alone, you don’t need to be alone.

    But if you want to ignore me and be combative instead, then that’s up to you.


  • I feel like this isn’t the way most cis girlies learn about makeup, so you’re not finding much material to learn this way. The fundamentals come from parents, from big sisters, from friends, and most importantly from experimenting and finding what does and doesn’t work for them. A book can’t tell you what looks good on your face, we all have slightly different imperfections and insecurities, slightly different tastes and aesthetics.

    Once you have that you build on it with more of the same, which results in the kinds of videos you’re seeing. You ask friends what they’re doing when they look good, what products they’re using, when a new style is trending girlies create shorts and videos for it, when you want to match an aesthetic there’s videos related to that aesthetic. You play, you mix and match, you share, you copy, and you innovate.

    Stop looking for documentation and manuals, embrace the sisterhood to which all women belong.


  • My point is that corporations cannot be victims because they’re not people, they’re a legal construct. They cannot be victims any more than a table can be a victim when I spill my drink over it. The term “victim”, whether intentional or not, is an emotive word that invokes ideas of injustice and suffering.

    Marketing teams and corporate executives convinced people and legal systems that corporations are people in an attempt to engender sympathy, personification, and to avoid responsibility for their own failures, like the case in this article where managerial and procedural failures by those in charge led to the ability for this ex-employee to be able to do what he did.






  • How have other transfems come out or explore their femininity more openly when they don’t look remotely feminine? I’ve been on HRT for 7 months or so, and I just don’t look feminine. I look a little more feminine than I did, but still not enough to be even close to looking natural or comfortable in feminine expression. It just… doesn’t look right. And that makes me feel weird which makes it look even worse.

    I don’t want to come out to people, telling them that I feel like a woman, when I look and sound like a man. And it’s starting to limit me in doing feminine things that I need to do to look more feminine so it’s circular, I’m too insecure to book a hair or nail appointment because I look like a man. I hate all of it.



  • It feels like my partner wants to be supportive because it’s the right thing to do, but at an instinctive level she is unhappy and resentful as she was raised in an exceptionally conservative, highly-religious, eastern european family.

    Which results in saying the right things, but pulling back short of any real support with passive aggression, apathy, and feigned ignorance. I’m not sure whether I’d prefer that to completely unsupportive.


  • Not so great. 6 months HRT.

    I don’t look good in any feminine clothing. I’m too insecure to practice voice or makeup around my partner. Because I don’t look remotely femme I’m too insecure to look for a hairdresser.

    My partner keeps pressuring me because I don’t like enough traditionally cis woman things, or don’t like them as much as I should, or that I still like some things that are not necessarily targeted towards cis women, and its ruining my self-confidence. I need local transfem friends I can reach out to and hang out with and go shopping with but its not easy being older and non-US.

    Once step forward, three steps back.




  • Amelia_@lemmy.blahaj.zonetoTrans@lemmy.blahaj.zoneHow's your week been?
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    3 months ago

    Gosh I’ve had way too much time to think this week, just turned myself in to an anxious mess. I don’t really have any friends and I desperately need to fix that but I don’t know how to start or even how to be a good friend after so much self-isolating. How do people do it?

    I also need to start practising with makeup and skincare, even if its just simple things like eyeliner and moisturizers but I keep getting insecure and procrastinating! And I need to stop whining about my problems instead of doing something about it! 😂

    Edit: Oh, and I just found out the service I use to get my HRT (GenderGP) removed the ability to contact them and “improved” their system with an £8/15min appointment booking, that’s so much better! /s