I did all the things. Transitioned. Quit opioids and cigarettes. Went back to school. Got discriminated against and persevered. Quit my last job because of anti LGBT policy and got my dream job.
Oh, and I did all that since 2020.
And it’s a nightmare. I’m isolated. No support, and I found out today my coworkers hate me and think I’m trash.
I don’t know what to do. Go back to school? It’s just going to be more of the same. In the last five years, I achieved more than I ever thought I could. And I’ve never been more alone or miserable than I am right now.
I’m tired of living in a world that doesn’t want me, that I’ll never be good enough for. My parents were right, I’m never going to be good enough.
So what’s the point?
Sounds like you have a lot to celebrate actually.
You’ve mentioned your accomplishments, they’re something to be proud of.
But one of the hardest things in life to learn and accept is that we each have to be enough for ourselves, regardless of what anyone else thinks, says or does. I also struggle with this, but I’ve seen the truth of it.
Even if the whole world was against you (but we’re not). The instant you base your worth on the opinions of others, you are setting yourself up to fail. Sometimes they’ll love you, sometimes they’ll hate you, mostly they will be indifferent. Is that where you want to be?
That’s not to say you should go through life alone. You absolutely need a strong support network – like all persecuted minorities, we need allies. That sounds like the final missing piece for you. First take a moment to recognize and appreciate allies you might already have, don’t forget them in despair; and then work on expanding your network.
As for the toxic people in your life, don’t give them the pleasure of bringing you down. Rise above and eclipse them, you got this <3
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