I’ve posted here a lot about my mental health, I lost basically everything, I have no one I can talk to, my car is wrecked, I have less than 100 bucks in my bank account, while I have housing their are problems that make it not the best. I have 1k in debt.
In terms of my housing, I lived with some members a activist group for a bit, but they got too extreme the the point where they think me wanting to pay of my debt, save up for a car is individualist and me wanting to go college is carrierist.
Another thing is I’m an unattractive trans fem, que transphobia, I know y’all are gonna laugh like hell when I blow my brains out, some of y’all might be like THIS IS THE Consequences OF GENDER IDEOLOGY.
I just really don’t see a way forward at all, I felt like there isn’t much for me in this world anymore. Everytime I call a suicide hotline I get the dumbest most braindead advice like do an activity I enjoy as if that changes any of the material conditions of my life.
My plan is to have a dead switch, so when I do die 911 is called to help avoid any unnecessary trauma. It’s crazy to think 22 years ends like this.
I know this might not help, but I’m a survivor of a suicide attempt and now know that there is hope and there is help. It just took facing my lowest point to discover it. (I’ve also been a part of the LGBTQ+ community since back when we had to refer to each other as “Family” or “Friend of Dorothy” so I really hope this helps you.)
Please reach out to local LGBTQ+ groups for advice and assistance. If you’re in the USA, apply for Medicaid and get into counseling asap (they’ll backpay from the date the application is submitted), apply for food stamps and section 8 housing. There’s shelters specifically for Trans persons, because many shelters will shun those that don’t follow bio gender. Food banks are amazing and they also have resources. Shoot your story to Point of Pride; which helps save and improve lives in the trans community.
https://www.instagram.com/pointofprideorg?igsh=MTk2aDJ6cTAwZDBmdA==