So there is a loneliness epidemic caused by capitalist alienation. However, I wonder if lack of material conditions also adds to this. I just keep seeing lots of my broke guy friends depressed because they can’t find a partner and it is so hard for them to meet new people. This makes me wonder if their financial situation is the main reason.

    • Black AOC@lemmygrad.ml
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      10
      ·
      edit-2
      10 months ago

      Could be the rarer-in-comparison potential for some women to paradoxically demand toxic behaviors out of men in their relationships, or worse(which I have personal experience with), women performing the same kind of lack-of-consent, ‘if you don’t want to fuck you’re less of a man/a b[redacted]/a f[redacted], this that and the third’ flavor nonsense-- F.D. Signifier has spoke on this a little, but always clarified that it is way rarer than the male-spurred exercise of toxic masculinity; so I rly don’t know how much bearing this notion of “women toxic masculinity”(sic) has on the issue.

      Either way, I consider it an issue less pertinent to politics and more to interpersonal dynamics, which all those factors are FUBAR right now mostly because a still-substantial percentage of men aren’t willing to work on themselves in ways to actively dismantle the toxic paradigms they’re living with.

      • boboblaw [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        10
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        10 months ago

        There’s also the disturbing rise of “femcel” groups like /r/FemaleDatingStrategy, which seems to mirror the toxic ideology and tactics of incels. A large part of that is basically women doing the PUA thing to get a trophy husband, though that’s largely in economic terms (salary might be prioritized over looks).

        • Black AOC@lemmygrad.ml
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          11
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          10 months ago

          You mean to tell me that wasn’t just a false-flag bit the incels were perpetuating? Those are fuckin real?

          • boboblaw [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            12
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            edit-2
            10 months ago

            Oh yeah, classic case of “the dream of the oppressed is to become the oppressor”. I went through that subreddit a while back and was shocked to see how toxic and fucked up a mirror they’d made of incels.

            Lots of advice on abusive relationship tactics and how to be effectively controlling and manipulative. It read like a bunch of sociopaths trying to outdo the redpillers. I sympathized somewhat because I got the sense that many of them were victims of abuse and considered it a way to ensure they wouldn’t be victimized again.

            Serious “fight fire with fire” vibes.

            Edit: Looks like that subreddit is dead now, and they’ve moved on to another platform. Maybe they were risking a ban due to all the rabid transphobia.

            Subscribers: 255,604

            Sub Description: Effective dating strategy for women that know what they want and prefer to be able to take control of their dating lives. Also includes strategies to maintain a relationship that benefits you. Plus tips on how to deal with some of the negative strategies from men that you encounter.

            Totally normal approach to dating. A relationship is a zero-sum game for domination and control. So why not play to win?

            Really disappointed I didn’t see more complaining about the current meta. It’s totally pay-to-win.