I’ve been admittedly struggling with my identity as a whole, especially as I approach my 1 year mark on Estrogen. So far it’s the right call for me, but I’ve discovered that I’m becoming more comfortable with my masculine traits and even find myself binding my breasts that I’ve waited so many years to have, while the next day I’ll do the complete opposite and present femininely.
I feel like I have no consistent sense of self and often have a hard time even knowing what’s going on in my head haha
Constantly trying to figure out if I’m a boy, girl, both, or neither, because I admittedly struggle with my body in various fronts. One day I’m too feminine, the next I look too much like a man, or I’m not androgynous enough.
Frankly, it’s exhausting. I used to think I was just a woman but it doesn’t seem to fit as I continue hrt.
It feels odd to express all of this but, I’ve not really talked to many trans people as I’m chronically shy. Is there anyone who can relate to what I’m going through?
Transfem (but not really (but kinda)) here, part of the problem is I don’t really “know” outside the binary, if that makes sense. All my life I’ve only really known the very binary standards and have been expected to uphold them. Since I’m AMAB I try to lean to a more feminine side since it is destroying the main binary I know, but I know fitting into the fem binary isn’t it for me either.
Tldr the binary is all I’ve known but I know I’m not but I don’t know how to not be binary.