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  • mustGo [any]@hexbear.net
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    19
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    5 months ago
    • download every episode of Winnie the Poo
    • navigate to Tienanmen Square daily
    • record yourself feeding sparrows every morning

    You will be immediately classified as a high threat target and directly monitored by Xi Jinping.

    • SkingradGuard [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      5 months ago

      It’s true, I did this and Xi used Juche necromancy (which he learned from the evil Kim Jong un) to resurrect Mao, who then proceeded to make me endure a struggle session and then sent me to the countryside to chop trees.