Massive hunger incoming again but my hosts will be away for dinner and I can eat leftovers with abandon. And I have bought a little instant noodle cup for extra snacks. And maybe tomorrow I will get some groceries while I’m out and about. They’ll be out for dinner again so I might make some dins for myself and extra for them. Fried rice maybe. But first I’ll check if they’re okay with my using their kitchen. I know some people are picky about this stuff.
E: I’m overhearing one of them talk to a friend of theirs on the phone,
bla bla bla
explaining positive reinforcement and how to stop being so unnecessarily harsh and critical of their slightly hyperactive and constantly inquisitive grandson, and how to celebrate and support him instead so that he naturally adjusts (I met this kid too and sat and played with him for a while). And to be more realistic about their own parenting successes and failures. And how to have good relationships with adult children who were difficult when young, how to have healthy but respectful boundaries with them when they have their own children and decide to raise them a different way…
Hearing her explain it in a way my parents generation and cultural background can understand, and skilfully countering resistance (“isn’t that spoiling the kid”, “these are just western things”) is making my heart melt and also a bit emotional for what I never had with my own family growing up… It’s very surprising because in a number of other ways this lady is quite uptight and conservative. I know she’s one of the few people my mum makes an effort to stay in touch with, maybe someday I could suggest that my mum talk to her about her own continuing conflicts …
Massive hunger incoming again but my hosts will be away for dinner and I can eat leftovers with abandon. And I have bought a little instant noodle cup for extra snacks. And maybe tomorrow I will get some groceries while I’m out and about. They’ll be out for dinner again so I might make some dins for myself and extra for them. Fried rice maybe. But first I’ll check if they’re okay with my using their kitchen. I know some people are picky about this stuff.
E: I’m overhearing one of them talk to a friend of theirs on the phone,
bla bla bla
explaining positive reinforcement and how to stop being so unnecessarily harsh and critical of their slightly hyperactive and constantly inquisitive grandson, and how to celebrate and support him instead so that he naturally adjusts (I met this kid too and sat and played with him for a while). And to be more realistic about their own parenting successes and failures. And how to have good relationships with adult children who were difficult when young, how to have healthy but respectful boundaries with them when they have their own children and decide to raise them a different way…
Hearing her explain it in a way my parents generation and cultural background can understand, and skilfully countering resistance (“isn’t that spoiling the kid”, “these are just western things”) is making my heart melt and also a bit emotional for what I never had with my own family growing up… It’s very surprising because in a number of other ways this lady is quite uptight and conservative. I know she’s one of the few people my mum makes an effort to stay in touch with, maybe someday I could suggest that my mum talk to her about her own continuing conflicts …