My gf(30) revealed she has gone through my phone behind my back and during an argument brought up a message to a random woman I matched with on tinder and never met. The thing is this was a good 4-5 MONTHS before I even knew she existed. I have been very open with my phone and given her the password but I still feel betrayed. Are my feeling justified?

    • flipht@kbin.social
      11·
      1 year ago

      This. If I were OP, I would feel rage, betrayal, sadness, and probably a bunch of other stuff. Having sudden and intense emotions is a good time for anyone to step back and think, “Why am I reacting this way? What are these feelings trying to tell me?” And reaching out to others online is one way to rebuild a sense of trust that you’re not crazy.

    • ivanafterall@kbin.social
      8·
      1 year ago

      Particularly because the sorts of people who creep through others’ phones without asking also tend to be the same sorts of people who gaslight, deny, project, etc… “Why are you overreacting!? It’s totally normal to be jealous! It’s because I care for you so much!” Etc…etc…

      It’s all different sides of the same lack of boundaries.